Yes. I'm still alive...

Okay, so I know it's been AGES since I've posted/emailed/phoned anyone and I'm terribly sorry about that. Turns out I'm in the boonies of Scotland (the Highlands) and, even though it's absolutely gorgeous with mountains and lochs and all that jazz, I have been literally isolated on a farm with no internet or phone service. So prepare to read the longest post ever over what I've been up to since I've left Edinburgh...it's been a crazy ride.

First off, I set off from Edinburgh and successfully made it to the train station with my luggage. Now, it was only across the street from my hostel, but I still consider it an achievement since I was lugging 150lbs of luggage up and down stairs-no small feet (sp?) let me tell ya. I confidently walked up, purchased my ticket, checked the departure times and platforms, found my train and boarded fifteen minutes before scheduled departure. I settled in, put all my luggage away, and sighed in relief that I got everything together ahead of schedule. After two peaceful moments, I glanced up at the digital sign in the train and realized, as the train began to move, that I managed to get on the wrong train. The correct train wouldn't reach the platform for another two minutes. Which I wouldn't be there for because the doors had locked and I was traveling in the opposite direction. Great. To make a long story short, I eventually got on the correct train and made it to Stirling to be collected on time. Thank goodness I actually had gotten ready early for once. Whew.

Upon arrival at the train station, my new employer-Melanie-and her nannie who just happens to be from Chicago-Colleen-picked me up in a tiny blue European car to drive the 40 minutes or so to the Monachyle Mhor Hotel. Picture me squished between two toddlers in the back of a miniature car trying to make a good impression on my new employer who is zooming up and down winding, wet streets in the rain like a crazy person. During the drive I found out that I would be working that evening as a server in the front of the hotel restaurant. So as far as waitressing goes, you know I'm pretty confident having like six years experience and all. However, let's just say this 4 star hotel fine dining gourmet restaurant is slightly different than serving burgers and milkshakes at Malcolms. I am virtually clueless about five course meals which we serve. I have to set up the table with a ridiculous amount of cutlery (3 knives, 3 forks, 3 glasses, a dress plate that you clear as soon as you get the bread, and that's only the beginning), serve the lady first, wait to clear plates until everyone has finished, never use a tray when clearing, serve the canape (pre-dinner fancy appetizer thingy with drinks), seat the couple, bread the table, serve the amuse bouche (an appetizer as far as I can tell), serve the starters, soup, the mains, then clear the entire table, crumb the table, give dessert menus, give dessert cutlery (yep, even more silverware), take the dessert and coffee/tea order, and push drinks all night. Talk about complicated. Every little tiny detail matters. I guess that's what you get when you pay $102 for dinner (not including drinks).

Anyways, the first night went okay; there's a South African Jewish guy named Sven (none of that seems to go together-right?) who runs the front of the house and he is the most detail oriented and anal person, but a really nice guy. I was pretty much the baby at the hotel so everyone either called me Miss Texas or little girl. I guess that's easier than trying to remember my name. I managed to survive my first shift with only one casualty-a broken red wine glass that comes out of our tips. oops. So I finished up, polished silverware and glasses (which is how I broke the glass), and set up the tables for breakfast. At this point, I'm quite exhausted from traveling and working all day so I trudge my way back up to the staff house dreading unpacking my stuff. I open the door and the first thing a hear is a cheering greeting from my new coworkers (who had all had the day off) and suddenly I have a cider in my hand and I'm meeting the 10 people I now live with. Everyone is absolutely lovely. My roommate, Elidhe (pronouned Ailey), is pretty much one of the nicest people I've ever met. She calls everyone 'babes' and 'darlin' and she's incredibly sweet. Then there is the Australian couple- Kiley and Toby. Kiley is only 23 but she's so chill and mature and it's calming to be around her. Toby is pretty much the exact opposite- he just turned thirty (we had a birthday party for him the other night) and he quotes spongebob, hides in cuboards, and is one of the funniest people ever. Colleen, the other American, is also hilarious. She's loud and fun and always sticks up to Melanie for me. Tony and Lewis are cooks from Zimbabwe and Scotland and are both super nice. I pretty much just liked everyone in the house, and it immediately felt like family.

So at this point in my super long story, I just want to say that unfortunately Melanie, my boss, is crazy. She has these crazy ideas that she just thinks are fabulous, runs around telling everyone how to change things, and then doesn't ever follow up properly on them. She has three kids but is not maternal at all- the kids actually call Colleen mom. How messed up is that? Then there is the whole being two faced bit. One minute she's your best friend and loves you, the next she's ignoring you, or worse, yelling at you. Seriously, psycho. So anyways, my first night working she chastised me when I greeted the guests for being too loud. Apparently in fancy dining, you have to be gentle and soothing and not how she so loving put it, gregarious. It's kinda hard for a loud, unsophisticated Texan to catch on to all this, but I thought I was learning. Apparently, she didn't think I was right for the hotel though (even though she didn't see me work after my first night) and she decided to move me to the bakery in town. At first I just thought I was spending the weekend there, but soon I found out she planned to make it a permanent thing. This meant moving out of the house and job I had just settled into and taking a job that she had not advertised for. Yeah...

Okay, well the library is about to close and I'm not even close to finishing my catch-up story so I'm going to go. I know this is probably really long and boring but I just need to vent, you know? So I will post the rest of my newest adventures soon. Until then, just know I love you all and miss you something awful!